How to Not Care What Other People Think

We live in a culture where our goals, our identity, our worth are often tied into what our culture values and other's expectations of us. We may understand this intellectually, that I am not my academic achievements, my athletic prowess, my looks, high paid job, ... but within us lives a child who wants to be seen, witnessed and valued, and who sometimes, without even knowing it, gives their power away to others.

I know this for myself - in my teens I dreamed of going to art school, however without even speaking about it I adopted the way of my parents who both had post-graduate university degrees. In my early 30's I started to revisioned things, doing more art which grew into a greeting card and design company that was represented in over 3000 stores including art galleries and museums in Canada and the USA. 

I also continued to work in psychology and studying yoga, until 2007 when I sold my design company, moved to Japan and focused exclusively on yoga, lifestyle writing and growing my energy medicine practices. The rest is history.

How to Not Care What Others Think
We ought to care deeply about ourselves and others, but not about what they think of us. Why? Because we are often wrong and even if we are right - is it worth giving our authority to them? 

Caring what others think about us bites hard because deep in our subconscious we hold deeply ingrained beliefs that dictate how we interpret our experiences and the world. Adding to that, humans have a negative bias which has helped us to survive, but hasn't necessarily made us happier. And so, until we examine and revision our limiting self-beliefs, our worldview remains biased and untrue. 

Ask yourself honestly and let your soul speak:

• Do you wake up every morning excited about your life, work and relationships?
• Who am I seeking validation and approval from?
• Imagine yourself at the end of this life. How would you have wished to live? Love? Accomplish?

Now, work backwards from this so you can live each day intentionally moving towards THAT.

My dedication to breathwork is not only based on my own journey to reconcile and release old and unserving beliefs, but also that which I have witnessed in my clients. What makes it so beautiful in this age of striving and doing, is that by opening our breath we deconstruct and unlearn all that has amassed and constricted our deepest aliveness, so that we can be at home in our bodies and with ourselves. 

To make authentic shifts and become the authority of our own life we need two things: INTENTION (shared in August's newsletter) and ACTION. That is, we need to be clear and committed to what we want and we must take action on it, otherwise we are just hopeful and dreaming.
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Breathing is the most readily available resource you have for creating and sustaining your energy, presence and personal authority. It changes our biology, resting  the default network that keeps us in our mind and estranged from really feeling.  Nevertheless, no matter what you choose to practice, the strength and degree of our growth and evolution lies in our daily routine.

In Transformational Breath we encourage a daily breathing practice to open to joy. In kundalini yoga we use 40 day Sadhana's to change a habit and install a new one. In Ayurveda the wisdom of daily routines is at the foundation of creating balance and authentic health. 

My advice is start somewhere and commit to it. Whether it is yoga once a week, eating an apple a day, daily conscious breathing, walking in nature twice a week. You don't need an App or Instagram ♥ for this - listen to what's working for YOU and commit to it. 

Live your unique expression and know that not one of the 7 billion people on this earth are like you. Don't conform - be YOU.